The Habit 2
Author and businessman Stephen Covey found that effective people had something in common. He wrote a book titled “7 Habits of Highly Effective People.” Among those seven habits, the habit 2 is this: “Begin with the end in mind.” In his book Covey invites us to stop and imagine our own funeral. So now imagine the people closest in your life – your family, your friends, your coworkers, and your church family members – speaking at your funeral about your life. What would you want them to say? What character would you like them to have seen in you?[1] At the end none of us really care about what we did, but who we were.
Yesterday at Mike Swallow’s funeral I shared we have lost three beloved church members in a row in two weeks. In fact, we have lost 21 church members over the past two years from Houlton and Hodgdon UMCs. Some of us may not be afraid of death. But most of us in this room are afraid of dying process – becoming a burden for our family, losing control of our movements, forgetting recent events and the names of visitors, and the list goes on. How and when we will die is unpredictable. But still we need to be prepared. How, then, do we prepare ourselves for death? In today’s passage we find one negative role model who is not prepared at all. But through this parable we learn about the important spiritual principles of how to prepare ourselves for death.
Live Each Day As If It’s Your Last Day
The first principle to die well is to live each day as if it’s our last day. The rich man in the parable fails to recognize the brevity of life. He thinks like he would live forever. He acts like he would live forever here on earth. He says to himself, “I will build bigger barns for myself. And I will have plenty of good things laid up for many years” (vv. 18-19). What does God say to him? “You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?” (v. 20) Life is short. The Bible says, “Do not boast about tomorrow. Do not say ‘I will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, start a business, and make money.’ What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes! Instead, make it a habit to say, ‘If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that’” (James 4:13-15, my paraphrase). We need to make it habit to say from our hearts, “Lord willing, I will do this or that.” We need this kind of humility, which comes from deep recognition of brevity of our life. How can we have this humility? We can cultivate this sense of humility by having a daily Quiet Time with God. In our prayer closet we hear who God is and who we are. Otherwise we can be so busy about our lives and preoccupied with our own well-being just like the rich fool in our passage.
Last week my family and I attended NEJ UMC Korean pastor’s family retreat held in Washington DC. During the second day of early morning service one pastor who was facing retirement shared his story with us. He grew up as a pastor’s kid. His dad was a small church pastor for life in Korea. When he was a teenager, he was ashamed of his father and his church. When he became a pastor, his only goal was church growth. He made every effort to grow his church. He had been so preoccupied with the church work more than 30 years. Recently, as he was praying and preparing for his retirement, then he realized what really remains. He realized what God really wanted was not for him to make the church bigger, but for him to be a better husband, a better dad, a better son, and then a better pastor. At the end not “do” goals, but “be” goals remain. How about you? If it’s your last day, how are you going to live?
Live Each Day As If It’s Your Birthday
The second principle to die well is to live each day as if it’s our birthday. Yesterday I shared as I was going through my grieving process, one of my friends and colleagues I admire recommended me Henri Nouwen’s book, Here and Now. In his book Nouwen asks the same question, “How do we prepare ourselves for death?” And his answer is this: “By living each day in the full awareness of being children of God, whose love is stronger than death.”[2] I paraphrase his words as “live each day as if it’s your birthday.” Celebrating a birthday reminds us that God’s love and life are stronger than death, God’s light is stronger than all the darkness. That is why we celebrate a birthday. God made us for one purpose: to give us love. God gave us one vocation: to give others love. 1 John 4:11 says, “Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” We were born to be loved and to love. In today’s passage the rich man was already beloved child of God, but unfortunately, he failed to recognize this. He failed to spread love and blessings that he had received to others. Instead, he found his identity in material possessions and hoarded things just for himself to be secure.
Yesterday was my youngest daughter, Grace’s 1st birthday. She just started toddling. That means Joyce and I became busier chasing Grace and picking up the pieces. Anyhow Grace just started toddling. Oftentimes Joyce and I love to have a conversation about many different topics. One day we were talking about something serious. We spoke intensely, trying hard to explain ourselves to each other and to understand each other’s feelings. We were so preoccupied with our own agenda and struggles. Then, Grace was walking toward us with faltering steps and with a big smile. Suddenly everything changed. Grace became the center of attention. There were smiles, hugs, kisses, and many tender words. Grace was not a distraction, but God’s gift to remind us of what really matters in this life. We are so often tempted to hear all other voices that pull us into despair. Nouwen advises us how to overcome this. He says, “More important than ever is to be very faithful to our vocation to do well the few things we are called to do and hold on to the joy and peace they bring us.”[3] To live each day as if it’s our birthday means choosing to receive each day as God’s gift and live out as God’s beloved children. In Christ we are born anew everyday. Everyday is our birthday. Today is your birthday.
Live for Eternity
Last but not least important principle to die well is to live for eternity. What does it mean to live for eternity? The Apostle Paul expounds it in this way in Colossians 3:1-3, another lectionary passage of the week, “Set your hearts on things above… Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.” How do we set our hearts on the kingdom of God? I think one of the good ways to cultivate this mindset is to regularly stop and think about the day when we give an account for ourselves before the Lord. In his book The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren gives us a vivid image of the day for settling the account. On that day God is going to ask us at least these two questions: “What have you done with my Son Jesus Christ?” and “What did you do with what I gave you?” What would be your answer? Are you ready to answer?
During my family vacation Joyce and I had a chance to attend worship service at one of my mentors’ church. His wife is a professional painter. She took us on a brief tour of her studio. All of her paintings were so inspirational. There was one particular masterpiece that stayed in me up to this day. The title of this painting is “Urgency of it.” In this hourglass there is Jesus in the upper part, the earth in the lower part. You see the time is running out. The day is coming. There is urgency about preparing for our death because our times are in God’s hands. Today may be the day. Tomorrow may be the day. We don’t know. But what we know is here and now is the time to prepare ourselves for death. For me personally, I often think about the day of settling the account. When I get to heaven, when I meet my God, I have one thing I really want to hear from him: “Well done, good and faithful servant!” That would be enough for me. That would wipe all my tears from my eyes and repay all the toils of life. My prayer is that all of us in this room will be well prepared and hear the same words of affirmation. Let us be faithful. Let us keep going. Let us keep serving one another. Let us keep loving one another. And let us be joyful. The Lord is near. Amen.
[1] Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change (Free Press, 2004), 97.
[2] Henri J. M. Nouwen, Here and Now (The Crossroad Publishing, 2006), Kindle Location 1419 of 1705.
[3] Ibid., 477 of 1705.
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